Today’s post is going to be random. I was walking yesterday for exercise and started listening to a Sally Clarkson podcast. She’s a huge believer in the importance of motherhood and discipling your children–and it got me thinking…
I love being a mother so much. I really do. It’s what I’ve always dreamed of being and maybe because of that, sometimes I end the day feeling like I’ve done the worst job possible. Was I too irritable today? Did I show enough grace? Was I patient enough? Did I play with Harrison enough? Do both boys know how much I love them?
I want my kids to grow up feeling safe here in their home. To feel comfortable in their home. To go to sleep each night feeling secure in their love from both of their parents. To see modeled how a true repentant Christian life is like.
And there are some days where I feel like I did an okay job, and then there are days where I feel like I am the worst mom.
BUT…I am thankful that I don’t have to stress out about what I am like as a mom. I remind myself (and I have to do this frequently) that God is sovereign over Harrison and Banks’s lives–that my job is to do the very best I can in loving and raising them, but that I don’t have control over how they turn out as adults. God is in control. That takes a lot of pressure off of feeling like I have to be a perfect mom all the time because it’s impossible! This doesn’t mean that I parent passively–I still strive to do a perfect job, but when I mess up and sin against my children, I repent and then apologize to them and ask them for forgiveness.
Okay, well I have no idea why I wrote this post, but maybe someone needs to be reminded of this just like I need to remind myself of this pretty much every day 🙂
